Clathrus Archeri: The Courtship of Mezou Shouji by one Kinoko Komori
by DominoMags
Summary: Kinoko Komori has a crush on a tall, quiet boy in the other class (No. Not that one. He's cute too though). She also has no idea how to tactfully ask him out. The Mushroom Idol will have to get by with a little help from her friends if she wants her daydreams of young love to become day reality.


Kinoko remembered her first day vividly. She had walked in with her mushroom-themed backpack, gripping its straps enthusiastically as her expertly groomed mop of brown hair swayed gently with each step.

She kind of hoped to meet someone cute, though that was not a primary goal. Going to a top hero school, she was destined to be an idol hero in no time. Or just a hero at least. All those fools who said she looked like a Muppet would be laughing no longer.

She was into pretty boys with attitude. Hawks was a current fave of hers.

That is when she laid eyes on the tall, mysterious boy from her rival class: 1-A.

He was built, that was for sure. His 6'2" frame towered over her, rippling with sinew. His mouth was covered up. What secrets did it speak? She had to know more about this masked, muscled man mystery.

"He's pretty scary looking," Pony said.

"I dunno about scary but he is very pretty. He must be mine!"

"Whoa there. You don't really know the guy."

"We go to school together. Who knows? Maybe our classes do interact. Might as well make a first impression. Besides, we can't judge a tall, beefy book by its cover."

X

Time went on, focus shifted onto more serious aspects of her future And yet, every now and then, Kinoko's attention drifted towards thoughts of love.

There were plenty of cute people in her class. Pony, Nirengeki, and Yui were certainly striking. Kuroiro too, but she saw him as more of a friend.

"Do you think he would let me climb in his arms even though I nearly choked his best friend?"

"Probably? But hey. I'm dating someone from the team that whupped my butt, so to each their own," Setsuna quipped. "Either way, you've got it bad. At least this is more attainable than Ha-"

"Sssssh… let me dreeeeeam. Besides, Tokoyami and I are cool now. He put in a good word so I could get a selfie with Hawks."

Setsuna slithered back into her seat after getting a refill for her water bottle.

"Sounds like you're pretty thirsty, Komori-vhan."

"Sssssh! Nobody can spoil this. Watch and learn, girls. Professor Kinoko is about to teach the art… of seduction," the portobello princess stated dramatically as she made exaggerated hand gestures, trying to add an air of mystique to herself.

It was time to put on that Komori charm. She was a fungal princess and an idol hero in the making. Charisma was necessary , and what better training than telling a boy you like how you feel? It would be like the test of courage, only with fewer villain attacks.

He looked at her from across the lunch room, causing her to choke immediately. Her bangs managed to hide some of her blush, but the damage had been done.

"Smooth moves, professor. No need to rush things, though. Why don't you just build your confidence up? Practice in front of a mirror."

"I already did that, Tokage. I even left notes in his locker. I tried to be discrete. I want to be alluring with an air of mystery on top of my cute demeanor."

Setsuna took one of the notes from Komori's hand. She read it and suppressed a giggle before passing the card off to Itsuka. The redhead read it with a grimace and clear concern for her friend's attempts at "subtle courtship".

_**"This is not a mushroom pun. Mushrooms are gross (no they're not. Please forgive me, shroomies ;3;). You're hot. Do you like me? Check yes, maybe, or no.**_

_**P.S. I kind of hope you say yes but no pressure. **_

_**Signed your Secret admirer"**_

"No offense, Kinoko, but I think you might need help. A lot, probably. But we would be happy to assist. Right, girls?"

The rest of the 1-B students at the table nodded. Across the lunchroom, Mina's ears perked up, but her attention was soon grabbed by something else. The pink girl mouthed , "I'll talk to you later." Kinoko appreciated all the help, but her female classmates were all she needed at the moment.

Kinoko's eyes lit up at the offer Itsuka and the other 1b girls made. It really meant a lot to her.

"You rule like toadstools! Thank you. So what should I do?"

"Probably stop stalking him for starters," Reiko deadpanned.

"Yanagi, that's how you hooked up with your BF so nyah." The mushroom girl pouted and stuck out her tongue. There was truth in what her friend said, though. She wanted a date, not a restraining order. Why was it so hard? Was she getting stage fright? Why couldn't being cute and small just be enough?

"I can't let this get to me. If I can't talk to my crush, then how can I fight crime or perform on stage?"

Even Kinoko admitted that was probably a stretch of logic, but courage and confidence were both attributes she believed crucial to all three, so that was her common link.

Ibara seemed to sense her inner turmoil, as well as her point.

"Worry not, Komori-san. I am sure Kendou and Tokage have a plan."

"Kendou probably does. Stalking is kind of my go-to, as well," Setsuna cracked.

X

"So, we're using the gym to train me to ask out a hot guy? Not complaining, but will Vlad-sensei approve?"

"I'm in good with him and I don't have to give all the specifics." Kendou winked. "Besides, we could do some actual training in case he drops in.

"Shroom shroom! How devious of our class pres. Not so different from Monoma, eh? So, what's the plan?"

"For starters, no more comparisons to him, please. I love the guy like a brother but he is seriously a handful. Secondly, you are going to practice talking to this training dummy"

"Is that all? This shouldn't be too hard."

Itsuka cleared her throat and deepened her voice, doing her best impersonation of a guy. She even used her ponytail to cover her mouth.

"Ah. Komori-San. What are you doing here? You wish to speak with me?"

Komori dropped to the floor giggling. This was probably going to be harder than she expected. It was made no easier when Awase took Setsuna's detached arms and welded them to the dummy.

"Okay. Maybe that was over the top. Take five," 1-B's president sighed into her palm.

After a brief respite, the mushroom girl tried again, only choking the first ten times. Eventually she was able to make eye contact (or at least the best approximation of it that she could, given the mannequin's lack of eyes).

Several quick changes were made, allowing Kinoko to prepare for any given scenario, whether it be joint classes or a more casual setting.

"I think we are starting to overprepare for this. Shouldn't we just get you comfortable with talking to him in general?" Reiko asked.

"Yeah, I think you are right. I don't feel any closer, girls. Sorry."

"It's ok, Komori. You did your best. That's what matters. Sometimes you just have to put yourself out there. And I mean "yourself", not just an incredibly blatant note in his locker," Itsuka chimed in.

"It was a bit much, wasn't it?" The short girl slumped to the floor. "Come on, girls."

"Yeah, OK. Eep!" Pony cried out as she made her way towards the door and almost collided with someone. Kinoko had been facing the other way as she picked herself up, so she paid no notice.

"Whoah, Tsunotori. Why the - WHOAH! OK!"

Kinoko looked up and became confused after her friend's expressions all changed to ones of surprise and realization, as if something new had come up. They slowly left, saying they would see her back at the dorms and wished her luck. Itsuka even gave her a pat on the shoulder and a wink.

"I'll let you two talk things out. Tokage, I'll carry the dummy. We'll put it back later after Aware gets your arms off it," The redhead picked up the mannequin and carried it out, with Yui offering to help her do so.

"Sweet! Thanks, Madame Prez," the lizard girl responded as she walked ahead.

Kinoko was frantic. Why were her friends leaving so suddenly? Why did their demeanor changes suddenly? What did Itsuka mean?

"Wait! Come back! What the pleurotus is… ," Before she could finish her sentence, the girl heard a familiar male voice and turned towards the source.

Sure enough, standing right there with his hero costume briefcase and a bag full of bottled water, was the man himself: Mezo Shouji.

"Oh. Should I come back? I didn't know 1-B was using this gym for training, sorry."

Kinoko was face-to-face with the object of her pining - or as close to "face-to-face" as she could with someone who had a good foot and a half on her. She reminded herself that heroes were prepared for anything and were ready to grasp their destinies at any given notice.

She took a deep breath and let loose a high pitched scream.

X

Five minutes of awkward silence and hyperventilation followed as the mushroom girl clawed at her own self-restraint and managed to gather most of it up.

The tall boy apologized gently. He had spooked people before in his hometown, but he never intended to. Luckily, the brunette calmed down. She stuttered a bit but managed to compose herself.

"Hi! Sorry for screaming. You just surprised me is all. I actually wanted to talk to you." the girl another out her outfit as she regained composure.

"Oh." Shoji was shocked. He wasn't expecting anyone else to be in the gym, let alone for them to seek him out.

Meanwhile, the heroine known as Shemage dug her mycelium down and tried to give herself morel support. The mushroom puns distracted her from how nervous she was.

"Yeah. Um… You were really cool in the joint training. I like your super move."

Her attempt at breaking the ice was a bit shaky at the start, but Kinoko felt she could recover from it.

"Oh, um, thank you," the tall boy replied politely. What lay behind that mask? Why was he so gentle despite being so swole?

"You're welcome." This was a start. She just had to have tact and grace. She would never capture any hearts by scaring people off.

"Do you want to date me?"

Or she could just blurt it out with all the tact of Mineta in a lingerie store. That worked too.

"Come again?" The tall boy's body tensed a bit as he cranked his neck towards the shorter girl, trying to determine if he heard her correctly.

_Shiitake!_ Why did she say that out loud? _Don't screw this up. You can salvage this_, she reminded herself. This is what you trained for. _You are an idol. You are a hero. You __**will**__ date boy!_

"I just think you're really cool and I want to get to know you is all." She realized that wasn't as intense or confident as she was hyping herself up for, but the mushroom girl was just happy she got this far without sprouting mushrooms all over like some kind of fungal acne.

In honesty, however, Mezo was rather confused. He had friends - That was for certain. He hadn't been asked on a date before, though. A few girls flirted with him during his internship after the sports festival, but growing up, girls had been scared of him.

One in particular was the reason he wore a mask over his face from to begin with. It didn't help that his hometown didn't take kindly to mutants. Quirks were fine only as long as they didn't result in physical abnormalities. The Creature Rejection army had a decent presence there.

But the influx of attention all made sense now, he supposed. The influx of attention he had been getting. He felt rather foolish for not getting it in hindsight, especially given the clumsy attempts Kinoko made at covering her tracks.

"Shoji, you ok? Sorry if I caught you off guard. I can leave."

"No, it is fine. I was caught by surprise. I guess I could, when we aren't busy."

"Peachy keen! Have any place in mind?" Kimono cried with glee. Things were coming together.

"I...I assumed you did. You're the one who asked me out. Not to sound rude, of course."

"It's all good like firewood. We'll get on like foxfire just you wait. Meet me at the school gates at 10 AM. Is this Saturday good for you?"

"I am afraid I have plans then, but how about the following Saturday?" the boy offered.

"Perfect! Sounds good to me. Anyway, I've gotta run. Here!" Kinoko skipped as she placed a hastily prepared slip of paper into her crush's hand.

"Sure. I'll see you around."

The brunette did a leap for joy. She had her date. It wasn't "Yes, I will be your boyfriend and reach all the tall things for you, m'lady. Also please, remove my sexy mystery mask," but you know. Baby steps. It wasn't rejection and she also didn't traumatize him, so it was definitely a good start.

With a spring in her step and a song in her heart, Kinoko returned to the 1-B dorms, ready to tell her friends what happened.


End file.
